F - O - G lights

It's been so long since I updated my blog I had almost forgotten about it entirely.

I have decided to strike out in a new direction.

Rather than bore people with the mundaneness of my daily life I thought instead to capitalise on the cathartic qualities of venting my spleen at all the idiots I am forced to share this spinning lump of rock with.

Of course, I do not expect the target of these rants to either read nor change their idiocy, but if in reading this it raises a few chuckles, everyone's a winner. Maybe it will even be like the tiny pebbles that start an avalanche, and we will all be swept up in a wave of common-sense.......hmm, probably not.

First topic:- Fog lights.

As is generally the case with such observations, I am often left puzzled that these things need to be said at all. I, of course, give people too much credit, for there are a countless number of people who clearly have less sense than they were born with.

Notice the first two pictures show cars in the fog, correctly using their fog lights.

Whereas the second two pictures show cars NOT in the fog, but also USING their fog lights.

Notice how the cars in the fog are made more noticeable by the use of their fog lights.

Notice also how the fog lights on the other cars serve no purpose whatsoever, except that is to burn the retina out of the eyes of other drivers, who would be able to see you just as easily, even in the rain no less, by the use of no other than, yes, you've guessed it, your headlights. Or, in the case of the picture to the left the fact that it is daylight!!

So, an easy way to remember: fog = fog lights. No fog = no fog lights.

And if your are so narcissistic that you must drive around in the day with your fog lights on so that you are noticed, I suggest you stay at home where you will doubtless have larger mirrors

So what have I learnt since being here...


Well, my Danish is slowly improving, although what I am currently learning is of no use conversationally, involving boys, girls and dogs, walking, running and jumping...remember those old Ladybird books of Peter and Jane stories, from when we kids....you get the idea....but I gotta start somewhere :)

I remain unconvinced about why there is a need for 3 extra letters in the alphabet: å, æ and ø.

The main obstacle I find is the words dont look anything like the way they sound, as an English speaker. For example, a particularly tasty bread they have here called Rugbrød is pronounced, to my ears, as oo-pull, although I am sure my fiancee will box my ears for my stupidity :D


There appears to be a whole ceremony connected to the topping of and eating of Rugbrød, which is bewilderingly complex to the outsider. Only some topping combinations are allowed and these are to be eaten in a carefully prescribed order. If you dont believe me, come here and sit down to eat some and watch for the shock/horror glances you get when you combine egg with sausage or cheese with Italian salad....scandal lol!


I am going to compile a list of things that Denmark should get from Britain, or the rest of the world and the rest of the world should really get from Denmark. So far I have learnt that Dr Pepper is practically unheard of here and they have scandalous holiday entitlement and mortgages (more on these particular rants to come). On the other hand I am certain Blighty would benefit from Denmarks social norms and values, oh and Karry Sild (a curried herring, which is curiously tasty).

So, here I am and here, as threatened, is my new blog. Thanks to Sting for the idea of the name, albeit his Englishman was in New York.

Its been about six weeks now since I got here, although two weeks were spent in Kas, Turkey on holiday. Had a great time there and will definitely be going back to Kas. Whilst there I asked my girlfriend (the principal reason for my being in Denmark) to be my wife. We are to be married next October 2nd. I am delighted :D

The days are ticking by pretty quickly at the moment. I busy myself job-hunting and dog-walking, interspersed with wedding planning and household chores. The employment market seems rather depressed at the moment, esp. in finance, where my background lies and the constant letters stating 'Thanks for your interest, but we have no vacancies currently' is a bit disheartening. I remain confident however that I will find something soon, even if its just a 'filler' job in a bar or a shop. Maybe I should start writing that book.